Life Sentence

Winter chill seeps through me
Encasing my heart in an impenetrable vault of ice
No pretty words or grand gestures, a capable auger
Tis the season of death
For me, no more springtimes remain
My hopes, my dreams fell like burnished leaves
Whisked away by gale force winds
Coming to rest beneath unseen trees
Even if I still cared enough to search they’d never be found
My friends once flickered like fireflies on a hot summer’s eve
But they too disappeared with the first frost
My joy, the flower petals of my life, wilted brown and brittle, rotted to dusty nothing
The cold lodged within radiates from my frozen husk holding all semblance of life at bay
My seasons have passed
I am eternally in the bleakness of deep winter

Whatcha Mean, I Can't?

When I was maybe ten my grandmother taught me to knit. I made a very basic scarf and then right to a multicolor, multi-needle ski sweater because I liked it and decided I wanted one. I was told it was too advanced for me. Six months later it got cold and I wore my personally crafted sweater. After that I made various other things and then for reasons I don’t really remember, quit knitting.

A little while ago I was chatting with a friend. One thing led to another and now I’m knitting a sweater. An Aran knit, fisherman’s sweater with lots of different cable patterns. Never tried them before but I remember how to knit and purl so why not? Again, I was told it was too difficult, especially considering I haven’t picked up a set of needled in at least 25 years.

Yeah, like that’s going to stop me. I went yarn shopping and had an absolute blast. Found the most gorgeous feeling and looking llama wool but it needed to be ordered because they didn’t have enough of the color I wanted. That’s okay. I took the pattern book home with me and taught myself how to do the cable patterns. My fingers feel a bit awkward but it really wasn’t that big a deal. The yarn came in and the sweater is in progress. It’s very involved so I’m sure it will take months but I’ll post a pic when I’m finished.

Speaking of things I had no clue how to do but didn’t let stop me, I got a great review for Controlled Desires from Seriously Reviewed. “…this erotica delivered 100% in the erotic end. What more can you ask for in an Exotica title. In the end the relationship issues were resolved between h/h and I was left feeling emotionally (and otherwise :) satisfied.” Thank you! If you’d like to read the whole thing, click here.

A White Christmas

Unheard of for roughly the last twenty years around here. But we had maybe eight inches yesterday, less than the predicted fourteen. Damn good this too since part of the cutbacks in Reading included the guys who used to plow.

So deep snow in December, not plowed. Open trenches big enough to swallow half of Howie where they were redoing the corner curbs which are now filled with snow. They’re lightly barricaded at the moment but you know that won’t last until spring.

Gonna be an interesting winter.

Drooling

My great friend and wonderful author, Regina Carlysle, has a new book out today. Edge of Nowhere, the latest in her High Plains Shifters series. Not familiar with it? Shame on you! It's downright yummy so go read already. You won't be sorry you did. I'm having a terrible time deciding which hero is my favorite. Once you read all of the books, please let me know which yours is but I'm warning you. It won't be an easy choice.

Click here to buy.

Blurb:

Book 4 in the High Plains Shifters series.

From the moment Cactus Mackey rescues Sara Farmer from outlaw wolves, he knows she belongs to him—and he’s more than ready to mess up some sheets with the sassy female. But she has secrets and wants to run. Infuriating woman! He might have to tie her to his bed but he’s not about to give up until she belongs to him, body and soul.

As danger chases her, Sara knows it’s a huge mistake to fall head over heels for the sexy lycan cowboy from Wolf Creek Ranch. A single touch from this shockingly seductive man melts her like butter under the hot Texas sun, and has her yearning for impossible things. The man is big trouble to her heart and running may no longer be an option.

I've Been Kindled!

I was playing on Amazon yesterday and stopped by my page to make sure it was still there only to discover it grew. Deal of a Lifetime and Drake’s Rules are now available as Kindle editions. I knew they were coming, just not when. How cool is that!

Deal of a Lifetime blurb –

Annette thought she had the perfect solution to prevent what was meant to be a pleasant anniversary celebration from deteriorating into a never-ending lecture from her older sister on the sub-standard status of her entire life. Inventing a fictitious boyfriend, reportedly detained in an unavoidable, albeit imaginary business meeting, seemed like a harmless fib if telling it would ensure a festive evening. She even had a plan to cover his exit from her life later on.

Rich’s estranged wife had gone too far this time and he’d had enough. He had no clue what setting him up as another woman’s date for an evening of drinks, dinner, and theater with the woman’s family was supposed to accomplish but he was determined to find out. When his new better half didn’t so much as blink at his unexpected arrival he decided right then and there that he wasn’t letting her out of his sight. He’d play his role of escort to the hilt to get to the bottom of it even if he had to tie her to the bed and seduce the answers out of her once the other couple said goodnight.

Drake’s Rules blurb –

Megan Lewis has been alone ever since a bad experience in college left her afraid to trust her instincts about men. When she comes home from her morning bike ride to find her neighbor’s young daughter alone in the hallway, the last thing she expects is overwhelming surge of desire she feels the moment her panicked neighbor joins them.

When Professor Drake Edwards loses his wife and son in a horrible accident he moves his daughter to a new town for a fresh start. He has no intention of getting involved with anyone. But when he finds his neighbor, Megan, watching over his daughter, his body has plans of its own. Can his heart and mind overcome the guilt he feels?

I'm Confused

I know I’ve mentioned it before but with what I’m going to say today, this bears repeating. Reading is broke. Seriously tapped out as in laying off essential personnel like police and firefighters. As in begging the state to put the city on a special program for busted locations. As in needing a specialized financial management firm to help get us out of this mess that’s been created over the past several years. It’s really that bad if not worse.

Okay, I’m sure you get the picture. There are some events this week that I simply don’t understand. One I heard on the radio and the other I’ve witnessed in my neighborhood. The first – In one particular section of the city it is now illegal to park on a space on your property that is unpaved. Nope, gravel’s no longer good enough. The area is a low income, semi-secluded area. Only one street in and one street out and nothing but housing in the whole sector. Yeah, I know it may not be aesthetically pleasing but there’s not enough street parking for the number of people who live there. No one other than those who live there and visiting friends ever see it so who cares? I get that it’s a money making scheme to fine these folks up to $100 each time they’re caught parked in there yards but one, they can’t afford to pay the tickets and two, the city has started cutting back the police force. Do we really want our remaining officers stuck writing tickets that are likely never to be paid rather than patrolling the rest of the city?

The second questionable activity I noticed is the continuation of having handicapped curbs on each corner. Perhaps they’re necessary but I don’t see it in these economic times. Every block has at least one alley that makes it possible for someone in a wheelchair to access the street. Personally I’d rather keep a few firefighters on duty than spare someone the inconvenience of going half a block out of their way. Also, I’d like to see the study that justifies the expense of digging up and redoing every corner of every intersection within the city.

Just doesn’t make sense to me to waste this much money on such things right now.

Odd

My electric alarm clock is running fast. It’s gaining about fifteen minutes a day. But only sometimes. Makes it kinda hard to know what time it really is and when I absolutely have to get up.

I’ve had wind up and battery operated clock both go fluky like this but never and electric one before. And what’s really weird is that it just started speeding up without anything else happening like it being dropped on its head one too many times.

I wonder if it might be me. My cell phone has started shutting off and back on randomly as well. The other day at work I attempted to make a copy and the copier shut down. And last week I set off a car alarm just by walking by without even touching the car. Interesting, no?

I Don't Get It

The whole Christmas thing that is. Surprising really, considering I grew up average middle class in a two parent household.

I was talking to a friend the other day. Circumstances caused him to lose his Christmases. I wanted to be empathetic and I was but only to a certain extent. Can’t really identify with something I’ve never had. It made it very difficult to understand what he’s going through and that made me sad.

I watch all those sappy holiday movies with morbid fascination, trying to absorb what the fuss is about but that really doesn’t work. You wouldn’t believe how foreign they are to me. I’ve often wondered if there might be someone who could explain it all, help me understand but I think I need to ask questions and I have no idea where to start.

Usually I go into hiding this time of year so I can ignore the whole thing. I can feel myself slipping into invisibility as I write this. I should want to stop that but honestly, I don’t. Not sure why exactly but it hurts too much to stay “out there” and for some reason this year feels worse than others.

Just wanted to let you know since I’m likely to be scarce for a bit. I’m okay and I’ll be back for real after it’s all over. Have a happy holiday season, whatever that may be.

A Fact

It takes only as long as you need to cross the threshold when leaving work for a few days off to get into vacation mode. Getting back into work mode afterwards, however, is an entirely different matter. I felt like this poor little penguin, staring out, wanting to escape all day. Fortunately, there’s only one more work day to go this week. By Monday I should be better.

I hate the word “drawer”. Say it a few times. See what I mean? It’s awkward and needs to go. Now what to replace it with?

Back tomorrow. Perhaps I’ll be less resistant to being functional by then.

Ho Hum

Is it true that on a statue the number of raised hooves signifies how often the rider was wounded in battle? When I went wandering the other day I came across this statue. I was being amazed by the detail on the horse’s face when this gentleman stopped and imparted that little tidbit. Interesting if it’s true. Kinda clever if it’s not since it was a great conversation starter.

I’m back now. Into the holding pattern that is my life. Can you sense the discontent radiating from me? Yeah, gonna have to do something about that one of these days. Probably sooner rather than later in order to keep my head from exploding. I’ll have to let you know what I come up with.